I am so glad to be back! Missed me? I know I missed you.  I thought about this space almost every day for the past two years I was away. I am so grateful you reached out to check on my creative side, I am so blessed! I had to take time off because of an urgent feeling to use my voice to speak on real life things (not that fashion is not real.) Now that I look back, I can see this is when the journey to finding my true self begun.

My blog started out as a hobby, but as viewership increased I felt obliged to take it more seriously. This seriousness came with a lot; from booking photographers, locations, dressing up in cars to spending money I barely had. By the end of my second year I was feeling empty, I was irritated when people saw the fashion blog before they saw me. Some people who previously called me just Rebecca, now  called me;  Rebecca The Fashion Blogger, It became the thing that defined me.  I felt guilty about this feeling.  I was supposed to be thrilled that my blog was getting recognition, but here I was feeling worse by the day. It seemed like I was competing with myself. I was offended that the real life situations that were very close to my heart were overshadowed. So I paused.  

When in doubt, pause.

During my long pause it was made clear that whatever is happening on the outside is a reflection of what’s going on inside. In the beginning I was not aware that I was searching for my authentic self, I remember thinking my blog (Not me) lucked a real purpose as though the person that wrote the blog was someone else. I could not see this because I did know who I was as a human being. My lesson is to know your purpose in life or at least find out what your true intention is before embarking on anything.

Keep improving your skill set.

It was now time to prepare for my debut after two years, I had to try to achieve something perfect or close, so I thought.  This journey was tougher than the former because it involved other people. I shot with a popular photographer who thoroughly disappointed me twice after paying. Until God gave me Zahara. My website designer was even worse than the photographer, even as we speak at the moment my site is not the one of my dreams. Throughout this process I have learned and I am still learning a few editing tips, web design tips to help me get by because the truth is no one really ever understands how much your projects mean to you.

Surround yourself with people who have your best intentions.

This is a general life principal, I am so fortunate to have a lot of love around me, both physically and virtually. This has and continues to carry and inspire a lot of my creative thoughts.  I have had angels come to my rescue very many times during the process of creating. You know who you are and you are loved. 

Thank you for stopping by, love Rebecca.

Photography by Zahara Abdul